he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize