i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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