I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
whose ass print is on the piano?
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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