its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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