what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
