We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Randomize
