I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
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