he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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