Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
cat food counts as protein by the way
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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