was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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