The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
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