and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
What a dumb baby whore.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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