he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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