It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
operation have a gay friend backfired
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
