Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
my poor anus
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
