do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize