My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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