check it out our google latitudes are spooning
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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