I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
