After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
