whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Randomize
