The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
