please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
