summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Randomize