It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Randomize
