Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize