I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
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