The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
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