I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize