Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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