none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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