no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
