So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
If I have put a neon “vacancy†sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
