she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize