Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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