that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Randomize
