THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
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