My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
