we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Randomize
