no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Randomize
