I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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