Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
