Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize