i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
