I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
The dick lei will go down in squad history
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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