Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
