these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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