My pussy is not your playground.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
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