Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Randomize
