real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Randomize