My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
