Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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